Hey...

not in the mood for writing.. actually its coz i don't have anything specific in mind that i wanna let out and rant about hehehe

sooo.. randomly...

-> It's only a month ago that Lady passed away.. I got used to that fact by now.. the old daily habits that I have with her is slowly dying away but.. gosh I still wish she's with me! I miss her badly. I miss taking care of her. I miss hugging her. I miss loving her! 11 years having her everyday in my life [well, except those months i'm in Bali ^_^ ] and now there's no her.. its just... well, in a way it gave me a sense of "freedom". I don't have to worry about her constantly and don't have to take care of her. But in other way.. just left this empy space in my heart.
Well, I haven't cry because thinking of her for a few weeks now.. but, I just might.

-> A friend told me in on a little secret that just blows me away AND freak me out!!!!! Oh my... I hope that person did not got to read my blog when I was being such a... silly groupies!! hahahahahaha

-> Saw an old eps of DnoA the other day.. [sankyuuuu Akanishi Jun! LOL] there's a 'scene' of Sho getting excited seeing a baby! Kyaaa ngegemesin banget deh Sho nya hehehe Kinda ironic isn't it.. Here I am, liking this person known as Sho Sakurai who is just well, maybe opposite of who I am in quite a few ways, one of them being liking & good with handling little kids. Me? I'm over that "I wanna have a little sister" when I left Elementary School. But now, not only I have to deal with them as part of my job, I have to teach as well! It's still the subject of conversation whenever my big family got together ^____^

Well, I handle them fine actually... I amazed with myself sometime for actually thinking of ways how to teach this little kids english when they don't want to..
Go me..! hahahahahaha

-> Wanna say omedetou to Sho-kun and GOOD LUCK! coz his 2nd stageplay [and his 1st without Arashi] will begin tomorrow! I hope & pray everything will go on smoothly 'till the last day. *hug Sho*

-> OMEDETOU also to Endah, Lilla, Panda, Putri & Mami. KATTUN finally debuted.
Well earned debut for Kattun! Enjoy your celebration days girls... until your bills arrive right? hahahaha but really.. omedetou! ^__^
Now I'm doki2 of how Arashi next stuff will come out.. I hope they still stick to the old routine of not so many version *fingers cross*

-> Did something yesterday that I haven't done for quite a while.. buying books! I love reading and I just love buying books, even though I might not read them at once but I love collecting them. Its been a while, since books is so expensive these days & I got caught up in buying things Arashi related hehehehe So nice to have that "ureshii" feeling after purchasing books back in me ^__^ Hopefully I can do that again next month.

Goodnight minna.
Don't do thing I won't do... *wink*
GBU.

New Son.. ^__^

Another great time after gath last Saturday, after the usual minna picked up their magazines & JE calendars, Lilla & Leli came and then with Dianne Maya & Endah we went upstairs again to the food court, eating & chatting. We laughed so hard that night.. exchanging crazy ideas & just chatting about silly things ^__^ And Lilla gave me so many fresh Arashi supply! Ureshiiiiiiiiiiii…. Arigatou ne Akanishi Jun… mwaks mwaks!! LOL

On Sunday, Endah SMS me about her good news… (another) new son! This time hasil mabok nya Endah ama Kanjani8, or lebih tepatnya sama Ohkura. Omedetou yah bu Endah.. Yabu dan Kohei dan Sato punya sodara baru.. lagi hahahahaha Padahal dulu gue sodorin lo kagak mau hehehe tapi beneran kok, kalo Yuki senyum, senyum nya mirip lo, kalo dia ketawa.. nah baru deh mirip Yabu ^__^

And with that.. gue juga punya pengumuman sendiri… hmmm kayaknya dari bulan Desember yah? Atau Januari… gue "konsultasi" ama Dianne & Endah, dan setelah lama di timbang2 dan rayuan2, akhirnya gue ngikutin Endah untuk pengumuman kalo Hikaru sekarang udah punya adek ^__^ Nama nya Yuma, lahir tgl 21 Nov 92 di Tokyo. Gol darah sama ama gue. Mukanya perpaduan antara gue dan sho, tapi kemaren Endah ama Dianne bilang kalo pas ketawa Yuma, ketawa nya mirip gue.. is it? You'll be the judge.. gue sih seneng seneng aja di bilang mirip hahahahahaha

Yosh… jangan heran kalo sekarang gue makin sibuk ngurus anak-anak dan papa nya banyak kerjaan.. seperti kata Panda, biaya sekolah mahal! Hahahahahahahahaha [gue dah makin gila!]

Malem nya gue ngubek2 majalah2 thn 2005 yang gue punya, nyari2 sapa tau ada anak gue.. ternyata, so far, dari bulan Mei mereka [yuki dan yuma] dah mulai muncul di section Junior, malahan anak Endah & gue pernah photo shoot bareng! Hahaha kawaiii Gue dan Endah juga nemuin kebetulan yang well… kinda cute.. pairing-an anak2 gue en dia ternyata nama awal mereka sama2 dimulai dengan huruf Y.
Yabu & Yaotome
Yuki & Yuma
Hmm… mudah-mudahan nasib nya juga sama deh.. maksudnya di satuin di grup yang sama kayak YYY, bair gampang nyari nya, ya kan 'Ndah? hehehehehe

Here's Yuma's pics..

tnyata di Summary 2004 dia udah ada [go to Introduction on your dvd, he's after Yabu-Hikaru-Yuto..] masih kecil... hehehe


dari Myojo5 & 10 2005



this is the latest pic that i have.. oya dia juga maen di 1 Litre no Namida bareng om Ryo ^__^

Gorgeous!!!

The one word that can discribe Arashi 2006-2007 calender ^__^
this time is so worth the money that I had to pay for it.
And I've already use it too hahahaha although the calender itself won't start until April.. so I use the one with Sho's solo pic in it.. kakkoiiiiii

I Love the fact that its HUGE in size, and its black! I love all the various pics [and also love the behind scene photo shoots even more] Love the variety thick papers that they use... Its just spelled "exclusive". I LOVE this calender.

Wanna thanks a few minna that helped me with getting this calender.. Sley, Endah & Panda also... arigatou ne... *chuu*

It was a very nice surprise actually... turned out that we can pick it up that Saturday [4th March] at Kino PS. I was so happy that I ccouln't stop saying "yatta" hahahaha.. duh gomen ne Tia-chan lo jadi sempet depress gitu ampe guwe ndak enak sendiri karena selalu loncat2 kayak fans arashi yg kegirangan hehehe tapi akhirnya HAPPY kan?? ^__^ but we should've make you cry first though... hahahaha

After getting the calender we all went to Sushi Tei for dinner... the food was delicious! We had fun eyeing the sushi that passed us by ^^ and the company was great! We all then take turn opening our calenders and then take turn getting our pic taken with the calender too hahahahaha *thanks Juju-chan!*

The Happy People pics hahahaha






And I managed to "kidnapped" Dianne to stay over at my house, and although we didn't talk much or do much dvd/tv watching [since she's busy scanning hehehe] I was happy coz I don't have to be alone in my room. The next day we went to Ambas Mal for lunch and a quick walk around the mal. Turned out I spent a lot of time in that mal coz when I got home around 4, my sis inlaw asked me to go there again to do the monthly shopping!!!! kyaaaaaaa tsukaretaaaaa....

I went to the office on Monday feeling more genki.. still misses Lady, but in a more genki-er spirit ^___^ Arigatou minna...
*irini hugs her gorgeous Arashi calender*

7 Days...

jadi kayak judul lagu nya craig tapi sebenarnya hari ini 7 hari udah gue spent my days without my beloved pet,my child.. Lady. baru hari ini juga berani buka email & blog and seperti yg gue kira, banyak condolences meseji.. gue udah mau nangis lagi baca nya.. but doumo arigato minna.. for all of your kind words & support.. thank you for all your tag, email, sms, phone call.. really means a lot ^__^ *hugs*

most of the advices that i got was to be brave and don't think too much of Lady that now she's in peace.. but the hardest thing is.. most of the time, gue nggak intentionally thinking of her day & night, but my daily life with Lady and especially at home & in my room, every little thing that i did pasti involve Lady in some way.. Such as, a simple sitting on the floor and a moment later Lady would come and sat by me or on my lap. Coming out of the shower, Lady would come & greet me. She would follow me everywhere while I'm in the house.. and now.. I just feel.. at lost.

Going down stairs in the morning.. it felt very odd that now I don't have to carry her down too. Going off to work.. I don't how to give her a hug & a kiss bye bye anymore. Coming home.. no more of that special bark & that two huge eyes greeting me again.. My house is now literally so much quiter.

All this daily habits of taking care of her, and loving her, and playing, eating, sleeping or just sharing a hug with her.. its so VERY HARD to brake. I still cry every now and again, and what making it even harder is.. usually when I cry over something.. I would have Lady to hug to and her big eyes would brought up a smile to my face. But now.. my arms are empty. And everyday there's still this feeling of blank-ness that I carry & still can't shake off.

Today.. marked the 7 days ago that Lady passed away. And me, I felt like that morning happened a long long time ago, but everytime I'm in my room & in the house, the pain reminds me that it's only a week ago, and that I still have a long long days to pass before hopefully I can think of her and not choke up inside.

My brother called me last night, saying that after getting Kyoko the new puppy vaccinated, she'll be ready for me to get her [he doesn't know it yet that i've changed the puppy's name]. But right now, my feeling is.. I don't want to take care of another dog. I don't have the strength to go through this again.. it's overwhelming me.

I guess when I realized long time ago that Lady needed me in her everyday life, I've never realize that I've become dependent to her just as much..
atashi...ganbaru.


Here's the pic taken 7 days ago by my brother..


doesn't she looked like she's just sleeping..





her casket.. i buried her fave pink pillow & blanket with her.